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healing a broken heart
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I love to be alone. I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude.

~Henry David Thoreau


Isn’t being alone one of the worst aspects of heartbreak? How can being alone help you heal your broken heart?

There’s Nothing to Fear About Being Alone

Yes, being alone can actually help you when healing your broken heart. One of the major fears that people face after having their heart broken is the fear of being alone. Most people do not realize that there is nothing to fear about being alone.

This is now the time to explore how being alone is actually a time for you to heal your broken heart properly.

Get to Know Yourself Again

Use this time to get reacquainted with yourself.  This is a time of self-discovery and exploration.

Rededicate your time to a hobby or pastime that you once loved but put aside for your relationship. If you did not have anything that you enjoyed doing with your time, find one.

Get in touch with your creative side. Use this newfound time to paint, draw, write poetry, compose music, write a novel or whatever creative outlet that you always wanted to try but were afraid to do. The sky is the limit. Your time should be focused on doing what you love to do. Your heart is in a fragile state, however, the time that you spend being alone can allow you to make tremendous strides in your healing if you use it wisely.

A New You With A New View

Build your self confidence. Your confidence is probably in the crapper after being dumped. Now is the time to rebuild your self-confidence by taking on small projects of accomplishment.

Exercise. Focus on creating a healthy body and mind. Your body is your temple. Often, we forget this when we fall in love and let ourselves go. Take up yoga or Tai Chi.  Learn how to meditate.  Use your spare time to create a strong body-mind connection that will support you in healing your broken heart.

Become the person you’ve always wanted to be. Reevaluate your life plan and make adjustments accordingly. What is something you’ve always wanted to accomplish but never had the guts to admit? Take this time to explore new avenues that will lead you to the place that you want to be.

All of these suggestions provided here will allow you to focus on something other than your broken heart or your ex. You need to move to first position in your life and being alone provides the room to do so.

~Here’s to your healing!

About

Nina Appleby is the author of Heal Heartbreak Now!, which is a 5 step program that allows you to move past the pain of heartbreak, find endless happiness within yourself, and experience Real Love .

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how to get over a crush
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Get Over A Crush Without Crushing Your Spirit

So you want to get over your crush with your dignity intact and with great speed? It’s not as hard as you think.  Often, unrequited love is a source of heartache. You find someone super attractive and a great person to be around, but they are seeing someone else or maybe they just don’t feel the same way about you. You shouldn’t feel bad and rejected, but that is exactly how you feel. How do you get over them and feel better about yourself quickly?

Why Having A Crush Can Lead To Heartbreak

Crushes are not just something you get as an adolescent. You can definitely develop a crush on someone as an adult. However, you might still feel like a teenager when you are rejected by your crush.

Having a crush on someone is not bad. However, when you realize that you cannot act on your feelings for that person that can lead to heartbreak, depending on how deep your feelings for this person are.

How Do You Get Over A Crush Quickly?

Well, the very first thing you must do is begin to humanize them. Often when we are enamored with someone, we often overlook their flaws. See your crush as just an ordinary person and not some superhero.  They are no better than you are. They are just someone that you developed feelings for and that means that you can undo those very feelings.

Let Go Of The Fantasy

Often when you experience having a crush, it’s not about the person you like, but it’s about what that person represents to you. The feelings they generate in you are linked to wanting to be in love or be loved. Or they could have similar qualities to someone you were once in a relationship with before.  If you remove the fantasy of being in love from your crush, you will begin to realize that your crush is just an ordinary person and nothing more.

Remove Your Crush Entirely From Your Experience

How can you get over a crush if you are constantly reminded of your feelings for the other person? Try to avoid seeing your crush at all cost. If it’s someone you are used to seeing at the bookstore or coffee shop regularly, go to another store or try going at a different time. Change the route that you bump into them.  Sit in another section if you have class with that person. If you have contact with them, cut all ties with them immediately. The faster you do this, the sooner you will get over them.

Hang Out With Your Friends, But Don’t Talk About Your Crush

Being with your friends is a great distraction for getting over a crush. They know how to lift your spirits and keep your mind off of your unrequited crush. They also know how to give you a confidence boost that you might be in need of right now. Just know that your friends love you and you are a wonderful person to be around, even if the one you like doesn’t feel the same about you.

Get Out And Meet New People

Meeting new people is a great way to forget about your crush. When you meet new people and expand your social circle, you are bound to find someone else to have a crush on, who might just feel the same way about you. Find new people who share common interest in you. You never know when or where you might meet your next boyfriend or girlfriend.

Work On Improving Yourself

One of the best ways to get over a crush on someone is to get a crush on yourself! When you turn your focus on yourself, you automatically stop thinking about your crush. Focus on being the best you that you can be. If you can’t find the motivation to improve yourself right now, Fake It ‘Til You Make It! This may allow others to see you in a different light than before and lead to a new romantic interest or two.

Final Thoughts

You Can Get Over A Crush With Your Dignity Intact!

In the end, you can get over your crush with grace very quickly if you remember that you are an awesome person no matter what your crush might think of you. Remember, there are other fish in the sea and there’s a vast ocean out there Baby, so dive in!

~Here’s to your healing!

get over a crush

About

Nina Appleby is the author of Heal Heartbreak Now!, which is a 5 step program that allows you to move past the pain of heartbreak, find endless happiness within yourself, and experience Real Love .

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dreams about your ex
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It is normal for a person dream about their ex after a break up. However, if you are constantly having bad dreams about your ex, how are you going to move on with your life?

Well, you’ve got to get rid of them not only physically but also mentally and emotionally as well.

Access to Your Subconscious Mind

dreams about your ex
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Some people feel that dreams are an entry point to your subconscious mind. Your dreams are a manifestation of what your subconscious mind has recorded and plays over and over.

 

Some people see dreams as a way through which our minds visualize something that we want to do or have but cannot. Since you ex is very familiar to you or may be closer to you than anyone else before, they are being represented as the character that you want however you cannot be with in your dream.

Still In Love

Still in Love

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Often we dream about our exes because we are still in love with them and they are a dominant thought when we are awake. It is normal to dream about being with your ex because you are always thinking of them. When you are ready to move on, your ex will make fewer appearances in your dreams.

Emotional Baggage

Emotional Baggage
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Your dreams about your ex may reveal emotional baggage that you may not necessarily be ready to unpack. Maybe you are having regrets about the relationship and how the relationship ended abruptly.

If you are having bad dreams of your ex, this could be a reflection of your own fears and insecurities. We all tend to second-guess ourselves. These dreams may bring on feelings of self-doubt about your break and may motivate you to seek to reconnect with your ex.

Your dream might be a representation of the power struggle that exists in heartbreak. Your ex has power over you right now. The dreams that you have about them are just another way that they are still controlling your life even though they are not around.

There are still some emotions lingering from your break up and you are expressing these emotions in your dreams. You need to address these emotions head on and they will no longer after your dreams.

Dreams Are Dreams

dreams about your ex
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Sometimes a dream is just a dream and it means nothing more, nothing less.  means that something in your subconscious mind is bringing  your ex to the forefront of your mind and it doesn’t necessarily mean it has anything to do with him at all but just as its translated into your dreams.

Don’t get too worked up over it! Focus on healing your heartbreak and moving on and you will be okay.

~Here’s to your healing!


About

Nina Appleby is the author of Heal Heartbreak Now!, which is a 5 step program that allows you to move past the pain of heartbreak, find endless happiness within yourself, and experience Real Love .

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Do You Really Want Your Ex Back?
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Most people suffering from heartbreak immediately want their relationship with their ex back. If you are considering getting back with your ex after your heart has been broken, there are five critical questions that you MUST ask yourself to make sure you are doing the right thing for your heart. Beware!   If you do not honestly answer these questions, you could end up in much more pain than you are currently experiencing.

1. Why do you want to get back with your ex in the first place?

Do you want them back in your life because of your own fear and insecurity or neediness? Do you really love them unconditionally? If  you find that your reasons for wanting them back in your life have a basis of self-serving motives, then maybe you want them back for all the wrong reasons.

2. How do you plan to make your relationship work better this time around?

You broke up for a reason. What was it and how do you plan to make it work if you get another chance? If you are not capable of making the compromises and changes that you need to make to make your relationship with them work this time around, maybe you might want to rethink giving your relationship another shot.

3. Are you completely over the emotional pain of the initial break up?

Break ups can knock the wind out of your sails. The pain of heartbreak can make you view the person you once loved differently. If you can honestly say that you no longer feel hurt by their actions, then you are ready to pursue another chance with your ex. However, if you feel bitter or any form of resentment about your break up, then there is a great chance that these feelings with put a damper on your reunion.

4. Have you fully forgiven your ex of their past transgressions?

Have you taken the necessary steps to forgive your ex of anything that you feel they did wrong to you in the past? Forgiveness takes a lot of effort. If you have not forgiven even the slightest hurt, you are bound to ruin your relationship again.

5. Will your relationship be stable enough to endure any future problems?

Let’s face it. Your relationship was fragile or else you would have never broken up to begin with. If you really want to get your ex back, you need to evaluate your old relationship and rebuild a new relationship on solid ground. If you don’t, even a light breeze can knock down your relationship if you can’t even weather this storm.

When determining if you want your ex back, it is important to look at the reasons you want to be with your ex again.  If you want to be with them again for all the wrong reasons, the chances of making your relationship with your ex work will diminish.  You should do everything to ensure that your ex does not remain in control of your life or you will remain powerless to them in the future.

Your real focus should remain on healing your heartbreak completely before you begin to seek rebuilding a relationship with your ex.  Sometimes it is in the best interest of your heart to move on and find love elsewhere.

~Here’s to your healing!

About

Nina Appleby is the author of Heal Heartbreak Now!, which is a 5 step program that allows you to move past the pain of heartbreak, find endless happiness within yourself, and experience Real Love .

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Break Your Emotional Dependency on Your Ex
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Do you feel a strong emotional “attachment” to your ex, but you don’t understand why? Are you finding that you are having difficulty letting go of your relationship because your ex provided you with stability and comfort? After the dust has settled, you now begin to see things in a new perspective that your love for your ex blinded you from. So how do you break your emotional dependency on your ex?

Well, first, you must understand why you are dependent on your ex in the first place.  Often, you became dependent on your ex to fill a void in your life that was most likely created during childhood.  You allowed other people to define your self worth.  When you met your former lover, they probably made you actually begin to feel worthy of receiving love. Probably for the first time in your life, you started to feel like you were valuable and appreciated.

Often, we become dependent on our lover based on the emotional needs that they fulfill. We rely on our partners to provide us with those “feel-good” feelings. Slowly, over time, we make them totally responsible for giving us that feeling all of the time. When they give us the attention that we crave, they provide us with feelings of love and approval.  They make us fell worthy and safe. However, when the relationship sours, the attention stops and our self worth starts to diminish.   It was unfair of us to make them responsible for how we felt every moment of everyday. This is why most relationships end in a “lose-lose” situation.

But there is hope. You can break your emotional dependency on your ex. You must first want to do so. You have to realize that this attachment is harmful to healing your heartbreak as well as your whole wellbeing.

Here are three major actions that you can start to take today to break your emotional dependency on your ex:

  • Learn how to be responsible for your own emotions. You are the only one who has control over how you feel at any particular moment. No one can make you happy or sad. You decide how their actions affect you.  You must become responsible for how you react to others emotionally.  Take control of your entire emotional system now or you will continue to be a slave to it for the rest of your life.
  1. Learn what your emotional needs are and learn how to give yourself what you expected your ex to give you instead. If you expected your ex to give you love and attention, give love and attention to yourself. You will find that you are more fulfilled when you provide yourself with the things that you think you are lacking.
  2. Define your own self worth and don’t let other people dictate what your worth is no matter how much you love them. You are the only one who knows really how valuable you are.  Start to appreciate all of the good qualities that you possess and let no one determine or undermine your self worth. Period! When you let other people define who you are and what you are worth, you give away your power and allow them to walk all over you. You are not a doormat, so stop acting like one.

 

I hope these tidbits help you understand your emotional dependency on your ex and how you need to break this powerful bond that weakens your inner strength now so that you can begin to heal your heartbreak.  You don’t need to take on each action all at once. Do what you can each day and eventually you will cut through that rope that ties you to your ex emotionally like a chainsaw.

~Here’s to your healing!

About

Nina Appleby is the author of Heal Heartbreak Now!, which is a 5 step program that allows you to move past the pain of heartbreak, find endless happiness within yourself, and experience Real Love .

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